Looking for Rainbows

This week we had a Spring thunderstorm for the books. The sky went dark. The air became ominously quiet. The first lightening strike caused a squeal from my three year old followed by a howl of thunder. And then the heavens opened up. I happened to be dropping off some flowers for my friend. All of the sudden she exclaimed, “I bet they’ll be a rainbow.” On a mission, she started searching the skies from every window for a sign. We waited. More darkness. More of heavens tears pelting the clover beds outside. And then she called it, “There it is.”

“There it is!”

My friend was so certain it would come.

I want to spend my life looking for rainbows. I want to place my whole being, my mind, my heart, my soul, my heartbreaks and my joys, in the hands of God. I want to live by faith confident that God will provide a technicolor bow in my skies.

In life, there will be lightening, thunder and despairing skies. Heartbreak spares no one. The sooner that we make peace with this ugly truth the quicker we can set about looking for signs of God’s grace. In the beginning of the love story between Creator and creature, God said, “I have set my bow in the clouds. It is the sign of my promise to you.”

To live by faith requires an inner certainty that one day the rainbow will come. We forget when we are brought to our knees by life, cursing the heavens and our heart is broken into a million pieces, that God is still there by our side. I remind you what else God said, “Remember, I will not let you go until I have done what I promised.”

There is always a blue sky and gilt sun. It’s the dark clouds that come and go.

Or to hear my mother say it. “Happiness lasts only for a time, but so too does sorrow.”

The storms of life will have their way with us. We cannot avoid or run away from heartbreak. Tears, anger, grief and even moments of utter despair are part of the gig. The secret is not giving in—or up. Because if we do Hope has no way of catching us in its luminous net.

The musical backdrop in my house right now is the soundtrack from the Broadway hit, Hamilton. My daughter, Belle, has memorized every word. Who knew that she had a talent for rapping. It has become this beautiful way for us to connect. Although the music is tremendous, the story of Alexander Hamilton is heartbreaking. Several of the songs will make you weep in your cups. Alexander Hamilton was an orphan, committed adultery, lost his son, and was murdered in a duel by his friend Aaron Burr. Imagine the dark skies of abandonment, the lightening strike through the heart when you wound the only woman you ever truly loved, the thunder and howling winds that tear through your humanity with the loss of a child and a most unfortunate early death by the hubris hand of one’s best friend.

Alexander Hamilton knew storms and dark skies, but he also knew how to look for a rainbow. At the beginning of the play as he is telling of his hard life he makes a proclamation, “I am Alexander Hamilton. And I have a million things I haven’t done. Just you wait. Just you wait.” These are the words of a man, humbled by life, but determined to keep looking for that bow in the sky.

When you find yourself in the scary and dark Deep, never stop looking for the signs of God’s presence. Make it your mission to look under every stone, uncork every bottle, survey even the darkest night for a glimmer of a star. Never lose hope that one day the clouds will part and the rainbow will come. God promises it.

Live in Hope,

Farrell